Finances in a relationship

Money is an essential part of any relationship. However, having big financial goals together as a couple can help both of you to be on a right track, when you are working together toward a fulfilling future. You might be in a long term relationship. Moreover, financial issues may cause tension in your committed relationship. When couples don’t agree about spending and saving habits, it may cause some arguments and resentment. It’s important to understand which financial methods you what to choose with you partner in your relationship.

Combination of finances

Both of your incomes are deposited into a joint account. In this case the couple are using one account and they have an agreed budget. However, to make this work! You need to sit down with your partner and count your joint income. Make sure you both agree on a specific budget that covers all your expenses from housing to groceries and bills.

Separate finances

You have separate bank accounts, budgets and bills. In this case one partner has control over their own money. This means you are not financially depended on the other partner. However, if your partner is not great with budgeting, it won’t affect your finances. Moreover, you only have to worry about your bank accounts, retirement accounts and investments.

Go half-half on bills (50/50)

Every expense is divided into two ways. Both of you contribute the same amount of money towards all bills. However, the couple must agree upon shared expenses like housing, utilities, vacation, date nights, etc. Moreover, in this case you can have control over your own money and also have an easy way to share expenses with your partner.

Share bills

Each person takes complete responsibility for certain bills. In this case one partner can be in charge of housing, utilities and electricity while other partner is in charge of groceries, clothing and kids stuff. Bills can be divided in many different ways larger bills can go to the partner who’s making more money. However, grocery bills can go to the partner who does the grocery shopping.

Combined income

In this method, both your pay checks get deposited to a single account. All payments and savings are made from one account. However, in this case each partner has a separate checking account. Moreover, it is important to figure out how much pocket money each partner will get. You also need to figure out what expenses will fall under the relationship fun expenses category.  

If you find yourself struggling with any relationship issues get in touch with us. Send the word “help” to the following WhatsApp number +27 81 352 0182 and we will call you within 48 hours.

Alternately Contact us now to find out more about Mens Clinic International – Relationship issues.

To read more about financial methods for couples, click here.

Work and family life

Balancing your work and family life can be very difficult sometimes. Moreover, when you have children and a spouse. To balance work and family life may be one of the most common sources of stress for the working a couple. More people are finding it hard to sufficiently fulfil their roles for both home and the workplace. It is very challenging for a couple to be able to find a point of balance between their careers and their families. However, family counselling or family therapies are available to help a couple to have a functional family relationship.

Balance your work life and family

It is important to achieve your balance whether you work full time or part time. Balancing your work life and family life may prevent you as couple from failing your marriage or relationship along the way. Make an effort to visit a family therapist. Considering a therapist may help you as a couple to identify and address your work life and family balance.

Seek a professional for help

As a couple you may sometimes think you can balance work and family life challenges on our own. However, over time you might realise that there is no way for you to get things right if you only rely on your own perspective. It is important to visit a family therapist to address specific issues affecting your family and work life balance.

Get some help from friend or family

Let’s say you are a couple working on weekends. Communicate with your kids. Allow extended family members or friends to help you. Make sure these are the people you trust to handle your tasks like bringing your children to sports practices or picking them up from school.

Create boundaries between work and family

It is important for a couple to create boundaries between work and family. This means determining which actions are acceptable and unacceptable. Boundaries hold the line to protect our family from the distractions of work, as well as to protect our work from our family responsibilities.

Set family rules

For example, no one is allowed to use a cell phone at the dinner table. This will help your children to focus on the family and avoid taking work calls during dinner. As a couple you may also decide not to check emails while on vacation. So you can bond as a family!

Benefits of visiting a family counsellor

• Developing healthy boundaries.
• Improving communication.
• Defining someone’s role within the family.
• Improving family dynamics and relationships.
• Providing strength and coping tools for family members.
• Addressing dysfunctional interactions.
• Improving the family’s problem-solving abilities.
• Adapting to a major change.
• Developing a functional and healthy relationship following a divorce
• Family counselling may also help by resolving conflicts between siblings.
• Counselling may also help couples dealing with inconsistent parenting.
• Family counselling may also help people with marital problems.
• It may also help people with mental health issues.

If you find yourself struggling with any relationship issues get in touch with us. Send the word “help” to the following WhatsApp number +27 81 352 0182 and we will call you within 48 hours.

Alternately Contact us now to find out more about Mens Clinic International – Relationship issues.

To read more about work and family life, click here.

Interracial couples

An interracial relationship is a form of relationship involving couples who belong to different races or ethnicity. When you are in love with someone, you date or marry everything that made them who they are, including their culture and race. However, most interracial couples still experience difficulty at times by cultural differences on a deep level. Though, love can conquer it all and love has no limits in this regard.

Cultural influence

Culture can also influence an individual’s perception and expectations regarding relationships and families. An individual with a different cultural background may oppose values of the other partner in the relationship. However, the racial and cultural differences in your interracial relationship won’t necessarily cause your relationship to fail, but a lack of communication may cause any relationship to fail!

Interracial relationship challenges

Interracial couples may experience hardships that other couples had never faced before. There might be possibly extra challenges in your relationship from people outside your relationship. So this may make you feel hurt, sad, and helpless. However, your partner is the best person to offer you support from these external stressors. Both of you should come together as one to face these issues of cultural differences.

Common challenges you may face

• Critical comments in public.
• Loss of contact with friends or family that disapprove.
• Negative comments online or in the media.
• Negative stereotyping.
• Open hostility and intimidation.
• Rejection from family or being disowned.
• A sense of isolation.
• Stares, insults and whispers.

How to overcome challenges

Being united as a couple is most important because it is the first step to overcome your cultural differences or negative stereotypes about your relationship. As a couple it’s important to share your vulnerabilities to each other in your relationship. To overcome the cultural differences or negative stereotypes from your surroundings talk about your feelings openly with your partner!  

How to deal with cultural differences?

• Understand and respect your partner’s background and compromise.
• So don’t expect your partner to settle seamlessly into your way of life.
• Get first-hand experience of each others culture.
• Pass on both cultures to your children.
• Think positively about your differences.

In conclusion if you find yourself struggling with any relationship issues get in touch with us. Send the word “help” to the following WhatsApp number +27 81 352 0182 and we will call you within 48 hours.

Alternately Contact us now to find out more about Mens Clinic International – Relationship issues.

To read more about relationship guide, click here.

Affection

Asking for affection is completely normal when you are in a loving relationship. Some people prefer to be affectionate through words or small daily gestures, whilst others wish for more physical affection such as hugging, kissing, holding hands in the street etc. You need to be able to find a common ground with your partner so that your displays of affection are suitable for the both of you.

Compassion

When you are in a relationship, you often have a feeling that you are one team. Both of you must encourage each other to achieve your goals. You should offer your support in difficult times. Therefore, it is natural to expect your partner to be compassionate when you are going through certain life problems. You should both be able to benefit from the support of each other. This does not mean that you necessarily have to share their pain, but to listen to them through hard times.

Respect

Respect between partners is essential for a relationship to work. However, the longer the relationship, the more you may need to make a conscious effort to be respectful. After many months or years of the relationship, when you know each other so well that you are not careful in the way that you talk to each other, it is possible that you could hurt your partner’s feelings by speaking without thinking. In all communication with each other, even in arguments, it is important to remain respectful.

Consideration

All of our actions and decisions can affect our partners in one way or another. So, it is important to be attentive, considerate and take into account their relationship expectations. That doesn’t mean saying yes to everything they ask but to listen to them and show that their opinion matters to you.

Time

Every relationship is based on the time you spend together, sharing moments and building a common history. If your partner has little time for you, ask yourself how much of your own time are you willing to give to improve your relationship. There shouldn’t be an imbalance between partners in terms of time devoted to the relationship.

Interest

Imagine if you are involved in a relationship where your partner is not interested in you, your activities, passions or even your opinions, that’s totally unacceptable! However, always show your interest to your partner. For a healthy relationship it is necessary that both of you are truly interested in one anothers interests. You can show interest to your partner by spending more time together, do some activities and participate in each others hobbies.

Intimacy

Intimacy is closeness between people in personal relationships. It’s what builds over time as you connect with someone, grow to care about each other and feel more and more comfortable during your time together. It can include physical or emotional closeness. However, there are usually things that we tend to keep to ourselves because they make us vulnerable. This is a privilege to be so close to someone that you can tell your secrets which no one else knows.

Generosity

Be kind and appreciate the help and support your partner gives you. However, this doesn’t mean only material or financial support, but moral and emotional support too. A good relationship works on give and take and it has to work for both parties in your relationship.

If you find yourself struggling with any relationship issues get in touch with us. Send the word “help” to the following WhatsApp number +27 81 352 0182 and we will call you within 48 hours.

Alternately Contact us now to find out more about Mens Clinic International – Relationship issues.

To read more about work and family life, click here.

Motivation

Motivation is the drive required to achieve your goals. However, most couples want to achieve their relationship goals over their lifetime. It becomes challenging if you have an unhealthy attachment or lifestyle. Sometimes it can be a challenge as a couple to stay motivated because of factors like depression or anxiety which may prevent you from achieving your goals. As a couple you need to develop a start-up formula to remain motivated in hard times. It’s important to understand what motivation means to you, so as a couple you can find your own methods to stay motivated.

Motivation is influenced by

• How much you want to achieve your goals.
• What results you will gain.
• Your personal expectations.

Benefits of motivation

• Motivation provides you with goals to work towards.
• It can help you to solve problems together as couple.
• Motivation may lead a couple to change bad habits
• It may help a couple to cope with challenges and seize opportunities.

Tips to stay motivated as couple

• Set specific achievable goals.
• Think about what you have always wanted to achieve as couple and make it happen by setting up some kind of frame work.
• Break your goals into small easy tasks and set regular reminders.
• Use your extended family or friends as support. Tell them about your goals and encourage them to help keep you motivated.

Ways to keep your goals on track as a couple

• Make your goals part of a regular routine by using a diary or app for milestones.
• Positive couple-talk is important and effective in managing depression or anxiety. Instead of saying “We can’t”, say “We can”.
• Mindfulness helps keep you relaxed and focused.
• Start a class or join a support group. Support groups can be as effective as professional help.
• Reward yourselves when you have completed a step towards your goal.

Tips for couples to stay motivated

• Regularly review your goals and progress. Seeing progress is a great motivator in itself. Always find ways to improve your self-esteem.
• Continue to set new goals. Think about what you want to achieve as a couple for next week, next month and next year. Begin with one goal at a time so you don’t feel overwhelmed.
• Keep the momentum up… It takes up to 3 months to develop a new habit, so keeping up the momentum and routines will help you stay motivated over time.
• Find a mentor or someone who is experienced in the habit you want to change. Finding a social or support group with the same focus can help you achieve results.
• Surround yourself with positive people. Positive friends and family enhance your motivation, which also helps to manage the symptoms of depression and anxiety.
• Use exercise as one of your daily goals to improve your physical and mental health.

What to do if you lose motivation as couple

• Setbacks are normal but developing a positive spirit can help you continue and pick up where you left off.
• Review your goals and see if they are realistic for the timeframe you have set. You may need to break your goals down further into smaller and more achievable milestones.
• Remember why you wanted to get motivated or reach that goal in the first place.
• Take motivation from others or feel inspired by reading books, talking to a mentor or friends or family who have reached similar goals to the ones you have set.
• Sometimes you just need to take a break and start fresh.
• If you are struggling to get motivated, talk to someone you trust, or a counsellor who can provide useful strategies.

If you find yourself struggling with any relationship issues get in touch with us. Send the word “help” to the following WhatsApp number +27 81 352 0182 and we will call you within 48 hours.

Alternately Contact us now to find out more about Mens Clinic International – Relationship issues.

To read more about motivation, click here.